“绿色行动倡议书”应用文写作
总体评价与常见问题
1. 优点:
大部分同学能理解题目要求,文章结构基本完整(目的→行动→投稿),能围绕“绿色校园”主题提出具体行动。
2. 主要问题(失分点):
①语法与拼写:主谓不一致、时态语态错误、名词单复数、冠词缺失、拼写错误。建议写完通读一遍,检查基本语法点。牢记常见规则。
②中式英语:字对字翻译,搭配不当,表达不地道。pay your attentions/ close the trap (关水龙头)/ deepen the understanding of awareness建议多积累英文固定搭配,模仿地道范文。
③要点覆盖不全:漏掉“倡议投稿分享”这一明确要求, 或目的、行动描述过于模糊。全文未提投稿,或只说“联系我”。建议动笔前在草稿上标出三个要点,写完逐一核对。
④ 逻辑与连贯性差: 句子碎片化,逻辑跳跃,连接词使用不当或缺失。行动与目的无直接关联。建议使用清晰的主谓宾句型;合理使用First, Besides, Moreover等连接词。 |
⑤ 词数不足或格式不当:词数不足80词要求,书信格式错误。建议平时练习控制时间,养成计数习惯;牢记书信格式。 |
备考与写作建议
1. 审题与提纲(1分钟)
圈出文体(倡议书)、身份(李华/编辑)、对象(全班同学)、核心要点(①目的行动,②倡议投稿)。
用中文或关键词快速列出提纲,确保逻辑链条:为何做→ 做什么 → 如何分享。
2. 写作与检查(8分钟)
开头:直接表明身份、倡议事由,开门见山。
主体:
目的句:用1-2句简洁说明。
行动列举:使用“总-分”结构。先用一句总起(如:Here are some actions we can take.),再分2-3点,使用并列结构(如:First, ... Second, ... Moreover, ...),确保句式多样。
投稿倡议:明确渠道(Green Campus column)、形式(articles / essays / experiences with photos)和意义。
结尾:用强有力的号召性语言收尾。
检查:留出1分钟通读,重点检查:要点是否齐全、动词时态、主谓一致、名词单复数、冠词、拼写。
3. 日常积累
建立“环保类”话题词汇库(如:low-carbon lifestyle, reduce carbon emissions, sort waste, eco-friendly)。
背诵2-3篇不同风格的高分范文,积累万能句型和逻辑框架。
高分句式积累(可直接套用或微调)
1. 开头 (Opening)
To promote a greener campus and raise our environmental awareness, our class is launching a "Green Action" initiative.
I'm Li Hua, editor of the "Green Campus" column. I'm writing to call for your participation in our upcoming class green activity.
2. 阐明目的 (Stating the Purpose)
This activity aims to enhance our understanding of environmental protection and put the concept of green living into practice.
The primary goal is to foster a sense of responsibility and encourage eco-friendly habits in our daily routines.
3. 列举具体行动 (Listing Actions) 万能框架
总起句:Here are some concrete steps we can all take:
分点列举:
First and foremost, we can start by sorting our waste properly and reducing the use of single-use plastics.
Additionally, turning off lights and electronic devices when leaving the classroom is an easy yet effective way to save energy.
Moreover, choosing sustainable transportation like walking, cycling, or taking public transport can significantly cut down our carbon footprint.
4. 倡议投稿 (Call for Contributions)
We warmly welcome you to share your green stories. Please submit your English articles along with relevant photos to our "Green Campus" column.
Your valuable experiences and insights are crucial. Don't hesitate to contribute your writings, which will inspire more classmates to join our cause.
5. 结尾呼吁 (Closing Appeal)
Let's turn these words into actions and work hand in hand to build a more sustainable campus!
Every small effort counts. I sincerely hope for your active involvement and look forward to your brilliant contributions.
“准确”比“复杂”更重要。在保证要点齐全、语法正确、表达清楚的基础上,再适当运用高级词汇和复杂句型,方能稳拿高分。